Thursday, June 5, 2008

Waiting...T minus 4 days

So am I pregnant or not? I don't feel particularly pregnant. But... I do have unusual feelings in my boobs. Or am I imagining that? And I have been tired. But aren't I always? I usually get my period on the 9th or 10th of each month, so I have four or five days before I've missed. If I don't get my period, then I am going to wait at least seven days before taking a test.
B is convinced that I am pregnant, but I keep telling him not to think about it because I don't want him to be disappointed. We went to see Sex and the City on Saturday (I thought it was ok - it raised my feminist hackles up a bit too much. I miss the sentiment of the original series in its early days) and went for dinner afterward and B and I got to the restaurant early so I asked the waitress to bring me a lemonade, but to put it in a drink glass. She looked confused first, but then got it and asked me "Are you going to tell your friends tonight?" I was embarrassed but told her that it was way to early, that I wasn't even sure, but just playing it safe and didn't want to talk about it with my friends.
I hadn't really thought that I was pregnant, but then I was having odd feelings in my boobs and thinking, well, maybe? and then I started thinking about everything that I've been eating and drinking since I may have conceived and whether or not that is going to have an impact on my maybe baby. I think I've been ok. I've been taking sips of alcohol here and there to not raise any suspicions, which is stupid. I've been taking extra vitamin C with my prenatals to prevent constipation, which I'll stop doing. And I drank some diet soda. I've switched to full sugar drinks (mainly juice) for now. I'm sure I'll switch to water if I find out I'm pregnant. It is so weird not to know. But that makes me feel that I'm not. Wouldn't I know?

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